Saunter on in to Jimmy’s Used Horse Lot to get yerself a rootin’-tootin’ deal on a gently-used horse. I’ve got all kinds a horses from nags to stallions and this is the only used horse lot this side of the Missisip to offer full coverage fer shoe throwin’.
This fortnight only, I’m givin’ away a free pair of spurs (an 18 cent value!) just fer comin’ down and sayin’ howdy. I’ve even got hardtack for the youngins.
Ask about special prices fer sheriffs and deputies*
This horse was ridden only three times by an old schoolmarm. The way I reckon it, this here horse would be just as happy to ride alongside a train while you jump on to rob it or slowly trot in to town at dawn dependin’ on if’n yer an outlaw or a mysterious stranger.
If yer an oil tycoon or corrupt mayor, why not treat yerself to somethin’ a bit more highfalutin? Plenty-a room for ya to sit way back on the rump, counting yer 350 dollar fortune while the hick what rides yer horse for ya sits far enough away that ya barely smell the manure he’s covered in.
Fer the rugged outdoorsy type/those blessed with a large family (literally everyone) this extra-legged horse will be the answer to yer prayers (provided ya didn’t pray for an end to tuberculosis). Finally there’s enough room on a single horse to hold the carcass of whatever varmint pa shot fer dinner AND the water ya need to get every single day from the well that’s 40 miles away!
Be the first in yer county to own the greatest advancement to horses since the mane. Everyone has a mottled horse or a horse with a spot but how many can say they own a horse with stripes? You’ll be the envy of all the other cowpokes, buckaroos, and wranglers.
* No mass-deputizations where’n the entire town gets deputized what ta round-up a cattle rustler or some such.